Thank you for loving us!
The exciting news (more or less - depending who you ask) of this past week is that Alex, Brooke and Caedmon have begun a new school year. Alexandra is a high-school senior, Brooke is a high-school freshman, and Caed will finish his career at Georgia Brown Elementary School as a 5th grader. Here are some first-day-of-school photos:
The less exciting news is that DJ Bigelow is down for the count with this first cycle of the study drug "TAS-102". An informal phrase would be, It is kicking his butt! DJ's pain is high, nausea comes into play, and he is all-around miserable, as far as I can see (he does not speak much at all). The two spaces that he has occupied since beginning the cycle a week ago Thursday are: debilitating pain and nausea; OR, drugged up with pain meds so much that he can only sleep it off or rest quietly on the couch, trying not to move. It is sad to watch him endure these circumstances, and I am hopeful that his determination and perseverance will result in the drug doing the work of chasing cancer away from his body. He has gone out of the house for a few field trips, including to the grocery store with me this morning, but for the most part he and the couch spend a lot of time together.
In the meantime, I am grateful for your ongoing prayers, and I mean GRATEFUL! Thank you. My most fervent prayer this week has been for mercy, which has mostly come in the form of pain meds that let DJ sleep away the symptoms. I am also grateful for your prayers, because in the middle of caring for DJ as much as I can, and working full time (which I utterly and thoroughly enjoy), and managing the household and children, I feel very sustained and upheld. Surely that is the grace of God, giving me what I could never manufacture for myself! I am so grateful. And I continue to experience a deep sense of peace and hope and trust, in spite of the different thoughts that wander through my head. I know that the LORD will never leave us or forsake us. I know that God's Unfailing Love will never be taken away from us. I know that following Jesus is the only way to go, at least for me. :-) I know that living one day at a time and enjoying one moment at a time and accepting hardship as a pathway to peace is a wise and good way to live, and that's where I'm at. I am grateful that my heart is peaceful and unafraid (even though I do feel sad and tired at times). It's all good! :-)
The study drug is administered in the form of a pill in the following manner: 5 days on, 2 days off, 5 days on, 14 days off. Except that the "two days off" last Tuesday and Wednesday did not cause any upswing in his health and well-being; so as far as the symptoms go, it is "12 days on, 14 days off" to me. Tomorrow will be day #12, his last chemo pill for this cycle, and then 14 days off. I am hopeful and expectant that his symptoms will subside and his health and well-being will improve in those 14 days!!
Tonight (if the LORD wills), DJ will be taken to Santa Monica by our friend Matt Magnuson for another 12-hour appointment tomorrow. This time DJ and his driver will bypass the Johnson Motel in Agoura and sleepover in a hotel that is only one block away from the UCLA clinic. I was persuaded by last week's driver Jerel Haley to choose this plan so that during the day between the longer blood draws, DJ may return to the hotel and lie down on the bed in the privacy of the hotel room (rather than "living" at the clinic for all 12 hours of the day). He will take the study drug close to 7:00 am at the clinic and undergo blood draws 30 minutes later, one hour later, 2 hours later, 4 hours later, 6 hours later, 8 hours later and 12 hours later.
And that's my story for now! Thank you, thank you, thank you for loving us! We are blessed beyond measure!
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